Do we ever really get over people?

*Do we ever really get over people? is a blog entry from an old blog I had in October 2006. I still agree with most of it. I just can’t remember who the girl was who was going to Vegas. I wish I could remember. Oh well. Enjoy!

Today, a girlfriend told me she wanted to go to Vegas because a guy she dated and thought was “the one” was going to be there with his company the beginning of September. I thought she was over him and on to her new guy. When I asked her about why she wanted to chase this guy to Vegas, she answered do we really ever get over people? Great question. So I said to her, you two live 10 miles apart, can’t you find some way to run into him locally? You have to go all the way to Vegas to run into him? She laughed.

This leads me back to my original question. Do we ever really get over people? Do we ever stop finding ways to stalk them? Does the checking their MySpace page  (clearly 2006) daily ever end? Does the Googling his name ever end? Does the checking his email because we know the password ever end? Does the checking his girlfriend’s email because we know her password ever end (I knew someone who did this)? When do we stop it? Or is it that it never stops, but simply slows down?

I know lots of women, including myself , who still want to know. We want to know if he’s seeing someone else. If he’s talking to his friends about us. If he still cares. If he’s dying. If he’s dead. There are myriad things we still look for when we “cyber-stalk” or invade his privacy. Why though? Especially when we’ve moved on to greater guys; guys who are worth a damn, trustworthy and who we don’t feel we need to check-up on.

**Whenever I’ve done the check-up it was never because I wanted him back. Well maybe during the early stages of the break-up, but if I was still checking up months or years later, it was because I wanted to make sure he wasn’t doing better than me. Or maybe to see who he loved after me. There are lots of reasons. I was always so glad to notice when the check-ups lessened. Twenty, thirty times a day down to twice a day, to twice a week, to once a week, to once a month, to I could care less what this guy is doing. It’s a good feeling. What do you think?

**Addendum Jan. 29, 2011. Since this post in 2006, I have mastered the art of getting over men quickly, so I rarely do any checking up or in, if at all.


1 Comment

Filed under Break-ups, Men, Relationships, Writing (all of it)

One response to “Do we ever really get over people?

  1. Mb

    “the term forgive and forget is a powerful statement.” I will say, I do forgive, but I’ll never forget….all that said: move on and don’t look back. You’re to special to waste moments…

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